This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize