Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize