He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
