pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
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