I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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