Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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