there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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