i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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