I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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