We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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