So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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