His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Randomize
