There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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