I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
