Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
