Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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