Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
