Porn is love you can see.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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