Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize