If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
