I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
