Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
The uberlube is also flammable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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