Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Kiss
Puke
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
