Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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