i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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