Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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