so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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