I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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