she was so not down for the gang bang
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
