You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
