I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
