i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
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for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
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WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
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