Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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