Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
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My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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