a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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