I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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