I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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