I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
