YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
