He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize