why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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