i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize