the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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