Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
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