I think I am morally bankrupt
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
