i dont even know how to be here
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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