A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
