Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I just want nice things and good sex
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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