I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?