i already hear my dad disowning me
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.