im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
