I wanna bring you to show and tell
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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