You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
You need Xanax blowdarts
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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