You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
